Foreclosed (Review)

Source: Review Copy
Price: £13.49
Where To Get It: Steam

Cyberpunk. Proper cyberpunk, not neo-futurism or cyber SF. Comic book aesthetic. Stealth, gunplay, hacking… You’d think this was right up my street.

But, in short, it’s not. I quite Foreclosed pretty early, and I’m not ashamed to say that. Because, on several levels, it just. Didn’t. Work for me. We’ll get into it after I explain what the game is.

Mmmm… A stealth section where I don’t have quite as much info as I’d like. Well, the important stuff is there, at least.

So, a third person (occasionally switching to first person, more on that in a bit) shooter with levelling, stealth kills, stealth, low health (at least to start), and “hit arrows in the right order” based hacking minigames. Oh, and the stealth kill is a QTE, button mashing 2. That’s your basics, right there. So… Let’s get into the few parts it got right, and then… The bits it got wrong.

In terms of general aesthetics, the music was good, tense stuff, chilling out during the quiet moments, the comic book aesthetic was indeed like some gritty inks I’ve seen in the past with colour, the voice acting (what I heard of it, anyway), was good, the comic booky bits looked good, and…

He’s a big feller.

That’s pretty much it. That’s… Pretty much it. Our protagonist takes up a lot of screen real estate, switches between walking and running… Well, seemingly in predetermined areas that nonetheless feel random, it switched to full screen mode whenever I came back to the main menu, keys don’t appear to be rebindable, default mouselook is fast, the first person camera has headbob you can’t turn off (and has a disorienting switch), the third person can sometimes be fucky, and there are segments where you’re forced into a different third person perspective than “behind the protagonist” (thankfully with absolute movement controls, so left is still left, right still right, and so on.)

And this was just what I saw in the first… checks… Half hour. I died precisely twice, once in the first stealth section (that one was most definitely my fault), and once in the first proper shooting segment (that… The protagonist is pretty squishy, the cover’s not great…)

Dead. And again. And again…

I’d have maybe switched to a lower difficulty (yes, there is a lower difficulty), but when I see this many problems this early on? Foreclosed was definitely not for me. I’m honestly glad I found this out early, even considering this is a review copy.

It’s a shame, really. There’s enough of interest here that if these problems were fixed, maybe it would be a fun, interesting romp, much like one of its main inspirations, XIII. But alas, it was not to be.

The Mad Welshman sighed as he looked at the television screen sky, and puffed on his neon vape. Time to get back to the grind…

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Tetrix (Review)

Source: Cashmoneys
Price: £5.19
Where To Get It: Steam

Wow, I haven’t seen this since FRAC, way back in the day… Legally distinct falling tetromino (well, not always) game, but in 3D, with a top down perspective, good luuuuuck!

No, really, if you get this I hope you have fun with it, because when I played this sort of game way back in the day, it was fun. Y’see, you can rotate in three dimensions, so more options, more thought, and, at high levels, more panic. The good stuff!

Let’s face it, do you need any other screenshots?

And, aesthetically, it’s alright! Nice vapourwave tunes, I’m good with those, a few UX themes to pick from, good colour differentiation, clear UX, and block types, yes! Although, sadly, none of the fun bullshittery of ye days of yore, like 4x4x6 blocks, or the dread CORNER T-BLOCK (no, really.)

My only problems with the game? Well… A few typos. Free Mode, Campaign mode. That’s… About it. It even starts nice and slow, adjusts the speed you start at in free mode, and, while it takes some getting used to (Check your controls for what’s X, Y, and Z rotation), once you get the hang of it, it’s pretty fun to play if you like Ye Olde Block Fallinge Game.

I do still wish it had some sillier blocks though, that was half the fun of some of the older varieties of this concept. Ah well. Another solid game, another game simple enough to understand and talk about that this entire sentence is simply padding. Give it a go if you like that one game which shares five letters with this one. You know the one.

The Mad Welshman loves spatial puzzles. Like where the hell to fit this book he just got. No, he doesn’t have a bibliophilia problem, why would you possibly ask that?!?

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Rogue Legacy 2 (Early Access Review 2)

Source: Supporter Gift
Price: £19.49
Where to Get It: Steam

For all that I enjoyed Rogue Legacy way back when, it had moments where you hated it, and felt it was extremely unfair. And sometimes? It was.

Screw you, challenge guy. Screw. You.

And so, I immediately turn to challenges for heirlooms, the items that, effectively, bar progression. Because yes, I feel those are extremely unfair. Here, in the path of empathy, a gauntlet of needing to use your kick to boost off the swinging braziers of death and pain to get to new platforms, culminating in a circle of them you have to navigate and, effectively, use twice to get to the end of that segment of the challenge. There, in the airdash path, a flamethrower segment that, if you don’t remember it exists, you won’t immediately hit the airdash button and hammer the fuckin’ thing until you get out of there. The first one is early on in the challenge, a difficulty spike that really feels out of place. The second is the same, although more forgivable because it seems to be toward the end, rather than the second part of a multi-stage challenge, exams to see if you can use these items.

This is not nearly as terrible a situation as you’d think. You can destroy these spikes. Others not so much.

Technically, I should have described the game for the newcomers before that, but it’s such a pressing piece of assholishness that I had to mention it, because right now, it is a turnoff, and a big one. So… Rogue Legacy 2 is a procgen platforming type dealio, where your bloodline has been cursed, and only by defeating the horrors of the haunted castle in which the curse began can you all be free. That’s harder than it sounds, by the way. A lot harder, because you start pretty weak. Weak enough that you’ll likely die within a few rooms at first.

But you do get better, and you get to experience new and interesting classes, regardless of whether you’ve played the first. This time, I’ll mention the Chef. Yes. Chef. A well made frying pan is an extremely powerful tool in the right hands, and if it’s also enchanted to burninate thy foes, and turn medium sized projectiles into fireballs? That’s… Pretty good.

So, aesthetically, it remains good (if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it), with important elements being clearly shown, some of the more irritating filters having been removed (yay!), and a pretty accessible UX and tooltipping. Cool!

Ahahaha… Fuck.

Less cool is the base keybinds. I’m going to be rebinding the keys next time, because the base keybind of WASD for movement (well, technically ASD, with W being for easy aiming of spears, and SPACE for jump, but) and Shift for… Errr… Bounce… Well, with shift being a little finger thing, that’s much more suited for prolonged actions, which a bounce… Definitely isn’t. I’m gonna have to move that somewhere more accessible.

But, overall, for all my bitching about these things, Rogue Legacy 2 remains a recommendation for folks into roguelike platformers, still being in Early Access as it is.

The Mad Welshman swears he’s got his shit toge- ahahaha sod, I’m dead.

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Samurai Warriors 5 (Review)

Source: Review Copy
Price: £54.99 (£79.99 with Season Pass, £26.99 Season Pass)
Where To Get It: Steam

The Sengoku period is one that is heavily used in Japanese media, and it’s for a good reason: There was drama, there was intrigue and backstabbing, and it was a time of great and bloody change. And Samurai Warriors, well… It’s been a long running Musou series, alongside Dynasty Warriors, and of the two?

Pictured: One of the two main draws of a good musou game.

Yeah, I like Samurai Warriors more. Sorry, Lu Bu.

Okay, primer on Musou games: They’re an action genre, involving cutting through vast swathes of weak enemies, fighting their commanders, taking territory rapidly, and fulfilling objectives to clear each mission, usually ending in either an escape or a boss fight. It’s twitchy, it’s button mashy, it loves high combos… And it’s grand. There’s a great feeling to slashing up tons of foes in an over the top fashion, people literally being juggled before your blades, slammed before your special attacks, and slammed into the ground by other specials.

Hot guys and gals, the other main draw of a good musou game… Okay, no, it’s the ease of play, but still…

So… Yeah, Samurai Warriors is fun. But is it accessible, does it look good, are there any critiques?

Accessibility wise, it’s solid. Aesthetically, it’s great, I’ve always loved the kinds of flair the game puts in (giant brush strokes, loud kanji, and soft 3d characters), and its music is solid. Mechanically? Well, it’s one of those simple in practice, hard to master type deals. With RPG elements like skill trees (and skill points shared between the entire cast, which means you’re going to be grinding a fair bit if you want to do it well), and skill gems, weapon skill upgrades, that sort of thing, it nonetheless eases you in nicely with the first campaign (With ya boi Oda Nobunaga), then branches out. And then, well, you’re going to be working out how to get certain side missions, getting skills, upgrading buildings… But the core remains walloping the shit out of people to get territory in a map.

A general, getting walloped because… Well, that’s a good 80% of what you do. You wallop things until they fall down, and it’s fun.

Overall, I really enjoy Samurai Warriors. The difficulty curve isn’t too steep, the tutorials aren’t too heavy, and I recommend it to people wanting to get into the subgenre, or musou fans.

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Ninja Gaiden (Sigma) 3: Razor’s Edge (Review)

Source: Review Copy
Price: £32.99 (or £39.99 for the Master Collection), Gaiden Sigma 1, 2, 3 included. Controller necessary.
Where To Get It: Steam

Hrm… The Ham is strong with this one… I mean, it was hammy before, but Razor’s Edge… Yup, this is the hammiest of the Ninja Gaiden games, and also the one that brings in annoying stuff earlier, but… I have to admit, if it weren’t for the whiny voice of the first villain (as opposed to the mastermind), I think I’d have enjoyed the early portions of the game a bit more.

I will admit though, watching the Prime Minister get ganked, even if it’s not the right one, is oddly cathartic.

I still enjoyed them a fair bit, because slicing foes up in this one is fun, the blood is on by default, the ham is pretty hammy, and because unlike the other two, I gave in and played on Hero mode. Yes, I am not the best at these kinds of things. Yes, I still came extremely close to death several times in the first two levels alone, as while there is regeneration of health after fights, your max health lowers if you’ve taken serious wallopings until you can regenerate it all back at a health point.

Anyway, yes, Ninja Gaiden is a character action game, a game of jumping and running and clambering over maps, beating the snot out of enemies with combos and special attacks and all sorts of different weapons you can theoretically switch quickly between, ninja magic (Ninpo Arts), instakills on wounded enemies, and Flashy Boss Fights. It is my jam, even if I’m not terribly good at them.

Yes, I chose the edgiest costume. Because why not?

Still… It’s time to mention the thing I really should have mentioned for the first two games, but will mention here because it’s pretty much mandatory to get the hang of from level 2: The bow. Is. Trash. Yes, it will instakill some enemies. Yes, for some enemies, it will auto-target. Yes, if you hold the aim button, you can switch enemies easily and it locks on most of the time. But also yes, this takes up valuable dodging time, murdering time, and seeing projectiles coming at you time.

Graphically, it’s solid. I won’t say it’s the prettiest, as it feels a little out of date, but it is pretty, the characters are designed well, and I can definitely tell when someone’s pulled out a gun. The music, also, is nice, it’s largely accessible, with subtitles and so on, it’s checkpointed well…

Just visible are one of several assholes which require the godawful bow to kill. Joy.

And of the three Sigmas, it’s… Not the one I’d most recommend. The other two bring the bow in a little later, as mentioned, it’s the hammiest of the three, and it’s also the one that uses the buttons most of all. Is it still good? Aye. Is it still peanut buttery, and not beginner friendly? Even the easiest difficulty is, make no mistake, a bit of a git… A fair bit of a git. But, since you’d be getting these in a trilogy pack anyways, well, at least try the peanut butter, since you’ve already resolved to taste it with one of the other two.

2 is still my favourite of the three, though.

The Mad Welshman wonders if we can get a BoJo mod, one where the model of the PM is slightly different, and there’s loud cheering and applause when… No? No? Well, it didn’t hurt to ask…

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